‘ROCKET-MAN’ Kim Jong-Un has boasted that he has much better hair than a certain ‘mentally deranged dotard’.
“It’s not orange either,” said North Korean diplomat, Gun-Woo Samsung. “Not even his pubes.”
“To be honest, I am surprised that Kim has so much hair left given his habit of posing in front of inter-continental nuclear missiles.”
“I am also proud to announce our Supreme Commander aced an international ‘cognitive ability test’.”
“He was able to correctly identify a lion, rhinoceros and a camel.”
“Animals that haven’t been seen in North Korea for a generation since starving peasants broke into Pyongyang zoo and ate them.”
“However, Kim Jong-Un did comment that there was little point to this section of the test.”
“They will all look the same after they are nuked.”