Labour rebels still don’t grasp being in ‘Opposition’ Support for 'Henry VIII' power grab by Government

Another prospective candidate

PRO-BREXIT Labour MPs still find the concept of ‘opposing the government’ too intellectually challenging.

“It would a major betrayal of the British public if I were to vote against the government on the EU repeal bill”, said Les Hope, Labour MP for Much Craplock.

“As a modern Labour MP, it seems my duty to support a Tory government with a tiny majority whenever they are totally up against it and my party stands a good chance of wiping them out.”

“Fine, Brexit hasn’t turned out to give the promised £350 million to the NHS but rather a £50 billion divorce bill but most of my supporters are divorced and so know all about bitter endings.”

“These people are incredible,” said Peregrine Snook, retired Tory MP.

“They think ‘a whip’ is some ghastly synthetic butterscotch pudding served to them on their council estate by their single mother.”

“They are basically Tory sleeper cells embedded within the Labour party waiting to scupper any chances of regime change.”

“Now they plan to support our unprecedented and unnecessary government power grab.”

“We didn’t need to purchase the loyalty of DUP MPs for £100 million each when we can rely on the support of people this stupid.”

A Plaid Cymru member said: “You could have had our 4 MPs just for approving electrification of the railway line to Swansea and a basket filled with bara brith!”


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Satirical comedy newspaper edited by 'Mallet' Mike. Documenting the lives and opinions of the fictional villagers of Much Craplock.

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