‘GOODBYE things’. Hello, multiple self-help books!
Edmund Bilstein, the Daily Squabble’s gadget tw*t, has had his house invaded by Japanese books on minimalism.
“I love the idea of minimalism”, said Edmund. “I would love to dispose of all my belongings apart from my iPhone, MacBook and refrigerator.”
“I even disposed of my TV after investing in a head-mounted viewer. It’s pretty anti-social but I don’t have any physical friends.”
“My house would be a sparkling clean and serene open space if I could only resist books on minimalism”.
“First, it was Marie Kondo recommending I should fondle all my possessions to see if they ‘spark joy’.”
“I religiously greet my house when I enter and thank my possessions for their help at the end of the day.”
“My underpants are folded vertically. I have thrown away all instruction books and unread books. I treat my socks with respect.”
“My favourite book is Kondo’s ‘The life-changing magic of tidying’ but, ironically, I have lost my copy more than once – eventually finding it under a pile of clutter.”
“I swear it automatically buries itself just to take the p*ss”.
“Recently it’s been Fumio Sasaki and ‘Goodbye, things’ pushing me to tackle the nest (storage) before the pest (clutter).”
“The whole neighbourhood is now my floor-plan and the local Morrisons is my walk-in larder.”
“This means that I have the best ever drinks cabinet.”
“Don’t trip over the pile of books on your way out.”