OLIVE-AGEDDON! Man given ‘all the olives’ in Italian-American restaurant

Olives
What are we going to do with the other 25 ?

INNOCENT diner besieged with slimy olives at Frankie and Benny’s.

“That will teach me to show off,” said Gavin Rowlocks.

“I casually ordered olives as my starter at Frankie and Benny’s, Merthyr Tydfil – to show I was a sophisticated man of the world.”

“I got a lot more than I bargained for.”

“When I say ‘I would like some olives’, I actually mean that I can eat five – if they are not too big, bitter, salty or spicy.”

“I ended up with more than 30!”

“It’s not like I can smuggle the other 25 home in my pocket for the dog. They’re greasy!”

Tiffany Gubbins, part-time waitress, said: “None of us have ever dared to eat an olive so we don’t actually know how many to plate up. They are pretty small.”

“Our restaurant is directly opposite a very reasonable cinema so we could have popped the excess in a grease-proof bag for Mr Rowlocks to munch on like popcorn while watching ‘Fast and Furious’.”

“Would you like to try some new anchovy tapenade?”

“A kilo seems like a reasonable portion.”

 

Photo by ‘The Daily Squabble’

 

 

 

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Satirical comedy newspaper edited by 'Mallet' Mike. Documenting the lives and opinions of the fictional villagers of Much Craplock.

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