World Worried that North Koreans are the Sane Ones! Kim Jong Un enjoys short break in Snowdonia

Kim Jong Un

DICTATOR enjoyed leeks, lava bread and Welsh national costume.

Gwynedd residents were surprised this weekend by the unannounced arrival of internationally maligned dictator, Kim Jong Un.

Barry Brith, a local B&B owner, said: “I am glad that Snowdonia was once again top of the list, for rogue world leaders, when it comes to short breaks.”

“We would have welcomed him with open arms at my establishment – which he could easily have booked through Airbnb.”

“Instead, he chose to stay in his own heavily armed submarine that a squadron of North Korean helicopters dropped into Llyn Padarn.”

Kim Jong Un delighted the locals by trying on a local woman’s cut-off pointy hat, munching Halen Mon sea-salt and learning the Welsh language. He laughed uproariously when informed that ‘popty-ping’ meant microwave and that ‘moron’ was Welsh for carrot.

Mr Brith said: “On the last night, Kim offered to give locals a free firework display. He wanted his submarine crew to have some targeting practice and fancied taking a pot shot at the Isle of Man.”

“He muttered something about it being the same size as Guam”.

“We certainly didn’t object. We wouldn’t miss a few tax exiles and tail-less cats.”

“As far as unstable dictators go, I liked him,” said Barry Brith.

“Kim Jong Un appeared to be relatively sane. He didn’t play golf or send any incendiary tweets all weekend and I am confident he won’t rush home and announce a snap election – like Theresa May did when the altitude of Snowdonia affected her mind.”

“Kim gave me this enormous jar of pickled cabbage – kimchi.”

“I am looking forward to dipping into it but it does glow in the dark and makes a very loud ticking noise.”

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Satirical comedy newspaper edited by 'Mallet' Mike. Documenting the lives and opinions of the fictional villagers of Much Craplock.

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